Happy Valentines Day


 Prov. 31:30,31

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

The last part of Proverbs 31 has brought cringes and challenges for women for years. In the verses in which a “wife of noble character is defined” the description sounds like a super mom/wife on steroids. Economist, wheeler-dealer, provider for all her family needs, the success behind her husband (all men can probably relate to that one), educator of children and pretty soon the list sounds like wow, “is that the expectation for a modern day women?” And “how does that description relate to our world today?”

That is why I quoted the last two verses of this well know chapter. A godly wife and mother knows the source of true self acceptance and strength in her life. It is not found in that which is fleeting, or deceiving, but that which is based in the eternal. Living life in the “fear of the Lord” – making the Lord the highest value in life and the source of personal security and strength results in a praise-worthy life.

It is then from this foundation in life that all the demands of life can be accomplished with grace and perspective. ( “…she can laugh at the days to come.” Prov. 31:25)

I’m not sure if the internet or blogs are the biblical equivalent of the “city gate” but I want to recognize my wife, Debbie and honor her for all that she has done and continues to do. Debbie has shown tremendous strength and fortitude over the past almost now, seven months,since my illness. She has had demands placed on her that have met her worst nightmare from a human perspective as a mother, grandmother and full engaged and committed hospice nurse.

When my illness struck she realized that she could not “do this alone” and was wise and strategic in soliciting the help needed from family members and friends. She was my constant companion at my bedside and for the five months of my hospitalization she spent 12 hours a day at least at the hospital by my bedside.

She became my biggest advocate and in her sweet, yet unbending manner ensured that hospital staff and doctors kept her informed as she pushed for the best care that I could receive. She was patient with my traumatic brain injury and I hope that some of the side effects made me more grateful than grouchy.

During my time of hospitalization she resisted a self-centered orientation and repeatedly would say, “I believe we are here to minister to the staff as well.” She conversed with, befriended and had relationships with everyone from the housekeepers, to medical staff to the highest level of the administration. When we left the hospital I wasn’t sure if they would miss me, but I knew they were going to miss Debbie!

She pushed her comfort zones to the limit in making needed phones calls to doctors’ and insurance personnel. She prepared for my departure from the hospital not knowing what my needs may require being ready to serve as nurse and physical therapist if needed. She learned to drive a rear wheel handicap van and became more timely and proficient at getting my wheelchair strapped down then most men.

When we visited my neurologist about a month ago, Debbie wanted him to explain to me my medical condition when he first saw me and how serious it was. As he explained all that was going on with me at the height of my medical crisis, stating that “most people don’t survive the condition you were in”, he went on to quickly give credit to Debbie for her diligence that facilitated and was big reason for my survival.

So, my assessment of my wife’s praise-worthy works and qualification for honor is not just the perspective of a thankful husband, but has been duly recognized by doctors and caregivers who observed her dedication.


 Picture above first picture of Debbie and me with me standing with the aid of my walker.